When a trial comes it either stops you in your tracks or it totally breaks you and when asked, "how are you?" you may just reply -- "fine, just fine!". But the tone and texture of your reply may speak more than your words.
I wrote this BLOG back in August of 2011.
Today, I know there is someone that is in the middle of a trial. She has seen some GREAT victories through faith and prayer but there is a LONG way to healing.
She has seen some breakthroughs and the HOPE she has in a victory within her family is not in her sight as of yet -- but she has faith!
In that time period of my life, when one asked me "how are you?", I would reply, "one notch above cautious!".
So, this is an OLD blog from 2011 -- but I believe someone needs to be reminded as they continue to pray to believe that this season will pass and they too will be one notch above cautious!
And as I read through it -- I rejoiced at WHAT God has done and that some specific prayers were answered.
So, as you read this OLD Blog...there are some updates. THAT, I believe can give the one reading this HOPE.
We need to encourage each other -- as God will win! You will win!
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Back to 2011 --
It is funny -- no it is God's timing, that today I just sort of went one notch about cautious.
What does that mean? Well, for so long there has been a trial, a problem, an event, or just a big old plain elephant in the room. So many things, events, people, and just STUFF involved. One goes through SO many emotions that you almost become RAW at one point and then HARD and vow NEVER to be hurt like that again!
And then you really RE-evaluate and think -WHAT DO I want?
What I wanted?? -- more of God.I wanted to be in the CENTER of HIS will and I wanted to hear those prophetic words, "well, done my good and faithful servant Michelle".
So choices had to be made.
James 1.12 says: Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
Blessed is the woman, hurt, that perseveres under trial, because when she has withstood the test, she will receive the crown of life that GOD has promised to those who LOVE HIM.
Blessed is Michelle . . it is hard to sometimes really believe that GOD loves me as much as HE loves Jesus. It is hard to wrap my mind around it.
And so, I have been cautious with my heart. I am cautious, I have good reason. But, when I really reflect and think -- I broke God's heart too. I loved HIM but I really did not WANT HIM . .nor did I really understand HOW to love HIM the way I was suppose to, nor did I understand HIS true grace and mercy.
But now . . .
I believe I can say that I have experienced HIS grace and mercy and so therefore, I must give it. Period.
To give grace and mercy .. sometimes it takes extreme patience.
Patience is to have the ability to endure, but it does stop there.
Patience must also have the capacity to be wronged and not retaliate. In other words, patience is love persevering and love waiting. We are not only to be patient in the way we face difficult situations but in our relationships as well.
Easy to say, HARD to LIVE.
Job Stood firm.
I remember the day I had a revelation -- God loves me like HE did JOB. God has allowed this trial in my life .. this journey .. this hurt . .because HE wants to see if MICHELLE will stand firm. I chose that. I have. I tired. I failed but I tried again. I choose this each day I wake up.
And with that, I have become cautious. People say and act a certain way . . .but sticking around long enough and listening and watching sometimes shows one's true heart.
That is why, I would say . .I am one notch . above cautious.
God's restoration power is at work, God's healing is at work, but it is not complete as of yet.
The smile on my face, praises GOD for the glorious miracles I see and hear and witness, but I realize the ENEMY is still fighting mad and won't stop! Together, and I am claiming this, together, my husband and I can defeat the Enemy's schemes for our family and friends and I am so anxious to watch how God brings this about.
I am believing that we, both, together can make a difference for HIS Kingdom and I want that. And I believe that God will reveal even more to my husband and do a mighty miracle with everything we have encountered and endured.
**** Insert today -- May 19, 2019 ...I do believe that my husband and I, together, did defeat the enemy's try to sabotage our marriage and our family. I read this today, and thought back to that DECLARATION. I did not SEE stuff that would guarantee me to believe that -- but I prayed and declared as if I WOULD. Praise God -- this has come into fruition!
Back to 2011 --
Every trial must come through HIS love but every trial has a purpose.
Every pain, every ordeal contains a seed of victory and there is a promise for every problem you and I will ever face. (I am stealing this from Mary Southerland)
Scipture says: " The Lord is my strength, my shield from every danger, I trust in HIM with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy." Psm. 28.7
Patience pays off in many ways, but one of the greatest rewards of patience is joy, a deeply - rooted confidence that God is in control.
I can say, this deeply rooted confidence. . that God is in CONTROL . .won't be shaken from me - ever . . .HE will do what HE says HE will do.
Today, as I finish updating this blog for today -- May 19, 2019. I have to add this in -- I wrote this blog and prayer back in June of 2011, after a very 'turning point' weekend. A weekend that I had prayed for, a weekend that changed the destiny of our marriage, a weekend where I felt the outcome would be THIS...and yet, it was THAT.... !
The enemy continued to do his best in trying to defeat us and yet...God won. As I read this prayer today back to myself, I just praised the Lord as to WHAT HE had planned. So, as I post this blog today, I pray that it will give the right one hope, it would maybe make the right one rethink what she is doing or what he is doing, and I pray it may even remind another that her healing is coming ....slowly, but that God is in control. The original post /prayer is in purple. I would use that color to remind myself that those words were ROYAL... and that I had a priestly inheritance. So, I will leave it be, and interject a few UPDATED praises. ( In black ) - May the time YOU spent in reading this -- not prove to be in vain. And if it helps you - I would challenge you to share it or maybe even comment, as my hubs and I would be glad to stand in the gap and pray for you as well. - Michelle
Heavenly Father, thank you for the revelation of the Encounter Weekend for both me and for my husband. Thank you for that day, that particular day when the gifts you bestowed on others spoke directly to him.
Lord, thank you for selling the house ( I know you will do that.) and allowing us to move forward in a new direction with a new purpose and a new calling for you. ( Our house sold in 5 weeks - God was directly moving us. I wrote Thank you even before we had an offer -- speaking it out - declaring!)
Lord, thank you for the little mini-tidbits of miracles and the hurts that have been healed with small gestures and comments. ( I couldn't comment on those mini -tidbits of miracles as they were personal, but over and over since the beginning of this fateful trial -- God has blessed me at the right time with the right people or the right things or the right stuff to move me forward. He knows WHAT makes me tick and what will speak to me -- and only me and HE knows that because HE formed me. I often remind others of this...and yet, we can forget easily. )
Lord, I would never say it was because of 'me' but it is because of YOU that I have the ability to give grace and mercy because I sit here humbled that you waited this long for me. I have the love for the manual-- it is here, the mind set is here, you are the master and are at the top, and the ministry will come. ( This is a direct reference to a prayer /words spoken over me by Tim Tebow's mother back in September of 2010. I held onto it - and believed it as the manual or God's Word WAS NOT my manual for many many years and the trial we faced....brought me to His Word. THAT was a good thing.)
I pray for my husband, Lord, do not allow the Enemy to steal what YOU have revealed to him and Lord, continue to restore, continue to bless, and continue to show me the wondrous mysteries of YOUR love through him. Lord, I thank you for the patience you gave me, for the healing you provided, I want to be way above "one notch than cautious" . .but you know my private prayers and you know how fear can still creep in ( that FEAR -- can creep in daily and even almost some 9 years later, that FEAR can still show its hurting/ugly head. Praise God, I can run to a mentor and prayer warrior to vent and seek for prayer; Praise God she points me back to HIM... THAT God will WIN...and that FEAR is NOT allowed. God won. Fear is defeated!) . .. . but I believe, I know . .YOU are GOD and you want this more than we do. Amen. I love you Lord. - Your grateful beautiful daughter - Michelle
I am grateful Lord for WHAT you have done and HOW you continue to heal and work within us. Lord, we both - only wish to glorify YOU. We humbly seek you and know, that when you ask us to move - we will follow. Protect us Lord, even now...so far removed from "one notch above cautious" but not blinded to how the enemy can so quickly throw a dart or cause doubt. May our lives be love song....may the fruit from our marriage and our testimony truly show to others around you that GOD CAN WIN. Amen. And may the one or many that read this today -- feel and know YOU want this for THEM as well. IN Jesus' Precious and Strong name - AMEN.
