THIS is one of those posts that are OUT of order.
Someone asked me today, "HOW" did I do it?
How did I survive waiting?
How did I know what God wanted me to do?
How???
Let me start with these scriptures.
Psalms 149.4 - The Lord delights in his people -- you -- he crowns the humble with victory.
Ecclesiastes 7.9 - Control your temper; for anger labels you a fool.
Galatians 5 The Message (MSG)
The Life of Freedom.5 Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you.4-6 I suspect you would never intend this, but this is what happens. When you attempt to live by your own religious plans and projects, you are cut off from Christ, you fall out of grace. Meanwhile we expectantly wait for a satisfying relationship with the Spirit. For in Christ, neither our most conscientious religion nor disregard of religion amounts to anything. What matters is something far more interior: faith expressed in love.
7-10 You were running superbly! Who cut in on you, deflecting you from the true course of obedience? This detour doesn’t come from the One who called you into the race in the first place. And please don’t toss this off as insignificant. It only takes a minute amount of yeast, you know, to permeate an entire loaf of bread. Deep down, the Master has given me confidence that you will not defect. But the one who is upsetting you, whoever he is, will bear the divine judgment.
13-15 It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don’t use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that’s how freedom grows. For everything we know about God’s Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That’s an act of true freedom. If you bite and ravage each other, watch out—in no time at all you will be annihilating each other, and where will your precious freedom be then?
16-18 My counsel is this: Live freely, animated and motivated by God’s Spirit. Then you won’t feed the compulsions of selfishness. For there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with selfishness. These two ways of life are antithetical, so that you cannot live at times one way and at times another way according to how you feel on any given day. Why don’t you choose to be led by the Spirit and so escape the erratic compulsions of a law-dominated existence?19-21 It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage; frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness; trinket gods; magic-show religion; paranoid loneliness; cutthroat competition; all-consuming-yet-never-satisfied wants; a brutal temper; an impotence to love or be loved; divided homes and divided lives; small-minded and lopsided pursuits; the vicious habit of depersonalizing everyone into a rival; uncontrolled and uncontrollable addictions; ugly parodies of community. I could go on.This isn’t the first time I have warned you, you know. If you use your freedom this way, you will not inherit God’s kingdom.
22-23 But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.
These scriptures remind me of the freedom that GOD wanted for me.
And in His wanting this for me... He allowed some heartbreak and crisis to enter into our home/marriage/life!
True freedom = being able to walk in freedom and know that you know God has you in HIS hands
And no matter what -- HE will make things right.
So I prayed --
And no matter what -- HE will make things right.
So I prayed --
Prayerfully walking - rather than emotional walking in that freedom is the hard task.
I sought help --
I sought help --
Seeking help -- Seeking counsel, this is a must.
And I allowed a few mentors to guide me --
And I allowed a few mentors to guide me --
Coming under spiritual authority -- that is also needed.
I can only speak of my own situation -- but when the Lord allowed a major heartache to be revealed, I sat back and got angry and mad. And I had a few ugly months where I destroyed physical things and if you were close - you got an earful. I spewed to some that I NEVER should of opened up to. But I was VERY careful not to spew it out on Face Book or to everyone.
I choose a few close friends. Somehow I just knew...if my marriage would be restored - there would be much I would have to correct ...and if we did not make it through...no matter what -- that man was the father to my children. I was NOT going to stand before God and have God look at me and say, "Michelle, why did you NOT do what I asked?".
That was the motivation for showing grace and mercy -- cause THAT is what God clearly had said to me.
God actually brought me a few new friends -- that knew NOTHING about me....and that was refreshing, as they always spoke life to me and about me...and about the person that was hurting me.
I sought godly counsel -- and I listened and DID what they suggested - prayerfully. When I did not want to -- I called them to pray.
I also sought professional help - and I listened to WHAT she stated to do -- we both did. It was hard....it was NOT easy ...it took over a year of counsel.
Insanity is doing the SAME stuff over and over -- in a marriage that has been broken...in a marriage that has suffered a loss and in a marriage where vows were broken.... you can't put a band-aid on it. You can't simply say 'I am sorry, and you are forgiven' and expect it to remain perfect. There is a sweet spirit there -- and the Lord will cover you -- but HE asks us to change.....
One piece of advice or thought process our Therapist stated and we quote often -- "an affair is a symptom" of other problems. Drinking and taking some drugs or pills to 'numb' the pain is a symptom of other problems and add that to a marriage....ouch.
When we prayerfully walk out our healing with counsel - godly and professional - and we take the time to MAKE the necessary changes of our own behavior -- I believe we can see and I have seen restoration.
When we allow our emotions to do the healing and the counseling...I have seen changes...but changes that did not last. Changes that hurt.
Humbly seek counsel....be willing to come under authority of a Pastor /Counselor and follow their suggestions. And if it is not working...go back to that Counselor and seek God and that person....many times... it takes some major surgery to fix a problem..... there is a cost.... we think nothing of the cost to run to an emergency room to get help....why not RUN to a therapist that CAN be a new set of eyes.... and allow them to help - change the habits.
The bottom line is -- I don't think some people WANT change.
I don't believe that some WANT to do the HARD.
People want QUICK fixes... God can do that- but many times ...it takes time.
HIS timing is perfect.
God is the God of second chances...and God will heal a humbled heart... HE crowns the humble.... but His word also says -- HE labels one that can't control their anger -- as a fool.
God is just.
God is love.....and God is good....but HE is just.
Exodus 14.14 - says that HE will fight for you -- God will....we must let God fight our battles...
Love covers a multitude of sins... and we must always forgive.
But we must also do the HARD.
If the Lord, has released your from a relationship because of adultery...then let it be......
But if God has NOT released you -- DO what God says... You will stand before Him one day - and you will have to account for your actions...what will you say?
Lord....use these words this eve...I pray YOU will be glorified.
Lord, for that one who has discovered her husband has betrayed their vows. Lord for the one who asked me HOW did you do it? Goodness Lord, You know - may this turn out well. Bless her Lord for seeking help. In Jesus Name... Amen.
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