Marriage is HARD. Bold prayers Day #8 Trusting.

  Yesterday, I had the opportunity to trust.  I went canoeing with my husband and a group from the present conference we are on.  There were about 20 of us.  Many were kidding each other in the bus ride over there about 'tipping' each other.  I sat there with my stomach beginning to ache and I stayed quiet.  Brendan knew -- I was scared.  He took the 'lead' and sat in the back and did the steering, I was calm and listened and no one did any tipping.  It was a beautiful ride as I did trust my husband to keep me safe.  I was just pretty unsure of the others in the tour.  

As we paddled or stroked across Alta Lake, I watched loons or Canadian geese just swim around and do their usual activities.  I witnessed two different kids camps.  One was working on kayaking and the  others were learning about sailing in their own little wind blown boats.  And there were three swimmers all training for Iron Man's.  Everyone doing their own thing on this beautiful body of water and I just continued to pray that we would not 'tip'.  It was a beautiful ride and I can see how people going out on a lake to fish ....well, it is just majestic.  And yet... I was scared.  Cause I could trust my husband, but not too sure about trusting the others in our tour and/or the elements!   

So, I knew today's post would be about TRUST.  

I am going to pray about trust in a marriage but then also share a blog post I originally wrote back in March of 2013.  That was indeed a LONG time ago.  Trusting a partner when they have hurt you so or broken marriage vows.  Trusting adult children when they have shown you over and over that they can't be trusted....  Trusting the love of an 'unseen' God when your own father may not have been trustworthy.  Each of these circumstances are HARD.  I get that.  Perhaps this prayer will help ....Perhaps the perspective on TRUST from 2013 will also be a help.  


Lord, for the marriages on my list today.  As I sat in that canoe yesterday and prayed to You, I prayed that each of the wives and husbands would have a new revelation of trust in You.  Lord, many of the marriages are in VERY tough spots and circumstances and only YOU can fix them.  Lord, again as each couple waits...as each wife waits...as each husband waits... may their eyes be so totally on YOU and may they TRUST in YOU to believe, there will be happiness again and that there could be full and total redemption.  Lord, that there will come a time when they will regard all the present misery as a small price to pay for having been brought to that dependence on YOU!  That is oh so HARD...and slow.  Be with each heart on my list of prayers today...from the one just trying to hold onto the belief that her husband would find Jesus -- to the one desperate to hold onto a 34 year marriage which continually seems to tear.  IN Jesus's strong and perfect name....AMEN.  



I came across this post from March of 2013 -- 

--My husband and I went to see a family at a hospital today, a family that we have been praying for for several days now and we prayed over their son in Critical Care.  He is not doing well, and there is a good chance he could spend Easter with Our Heavenly Father, but we are believing in a miracle!  How do I know that, or believe in that miracle?....Trust...in HIM.

Trusting is a HARD thing.  When it comes to the 'bottom' of it, people will say they trust in this or that, but to me it takes a WHOLE lot more faith to trust in a person than it is to trust in GOD.

People fail us.  God does not fail us.  But what happens when....HE does not heal or he does allow the heartache to last.....ah, yes, THAT is when we must TRUST - right?

Or Rely on HIM?

 I found this:  The thing is to rely only on God.  The time will come when you will regard all this misery as a small price to pay for having been brought to that dependance.  Meanwhile, the trouble is that relying on God has to begin all over again EVERY day as if nothing has yet been done.  - CS Lewis.

Pretty profound hugh?

God's timing is perfect and it is no accident that I have called out to HIM and begged for healing for two special people this week.   Now we must trust that GOD will do HIS best work.

Trust...

Trust hangs somewhere between knowing what your heart longs for and trying to dictate the shape or timing or outcome of your heart's desire.     
It lies in the willingness to accept the particulars of how and when and where God chooses to intervene.  It waits in the cool shade of surrender.   - Paula Reinhart 

There are loads of things that lead us to TRUST God...

....like knowing your marriage may end
.....like taking a phone call from your sister and hearing the words, 'we have lost Blake'...
....like  seeing your parents hurt each other with words and realize the hurt has gotten so deep...
....like moving across the country for a job
.... like jumping feet first into a new challenge when you are scared to DEATH!
....like sitting at the foot of a bed and watch a child struggle to breathe
...like seeking a new job when you know it will be a challenge
.....like getting a phone call that totally shakes your life
.....like finding a lump and sitting under a PET scan and wondering if the cancer is back
.....like moving back home when a family is broken
.....like hearing the words, 'I don't love you'...
....like coming home and being scared of what you will find...
....like believing your were never loved...
....like hearing of another's heartache and it brings you to action but ...what could you do?
....like thinking that you are unloved..
....like believing that a hurt from childhood could harm your entire present reality
....like being tossed back and forth by the winds of change...
...like....being so hurt as a child, that you have cut off anyone that could hurt you as an adult, but that makes you isolated...
....like... ...like...like...

Some of these experiences are mine...others are people I know...and others are just experiences...that is not the point - the point is what has caused YOU to trust God?

Paula Reinhart says that the root of trust comes from being grounded in the fact and knowledge that you are LOVED by God.  That no matter what, as long as I am loved by God..HE will lead me to the light in this cruel world.   Do I know that - that I am SO loved?  HIS word says I was so loved before the foundation of the world.

Learning to trust my husband again has been hard, but I trust him through my Lord.
*** Update...I trust him completely now -- as I trust God and whenever the enemy wants to taunt me, I just remind him that GOD has us and him.....
Learning to trust God, has been something I have been working on for YEARS!
****Update....  I trust God a LOT more now.  I originally wrote this post in 2013... my level of TRUST for God is greater, as I have seen great miracles and faith but I have also had some real hurts as well -- but EACH time, HE is still a Good Good Father  -- He just is.  
Learning to trust God when it comes to our immediate friends and family and with their healing....

Paula says, "if we let ourselves be loved by God, our hands release their grips on the reins of our lives and we stop trying so hard to be the one with all the answers".

God has the answers.  I don't.

Will Trace's cancer be shrunk to its disappearance?  ( Trace went to be with Jesus in November of 2013, she is healed now.  But I have a few new friends battling now with cancer and I am believing for a total healing - here!!  ) 
Will Chris sit in church again - soon? ( Chris had a miracle and attended church again.... I have not seen him in a long time - believing he is living for the Lord.) 
Will I ever get this figured out? ( I think WHEN that happens...I will be with HIM.... we were not made to FIGURE it all out -- we were made to CRAVE HIM and seek HIM!) 


I am believing and trusting-

Paula says this too:

God is always good.  If life is like a deck of cards, then God is always the wild card.  He is not subject to our human efforts to influence outcomes, we are subject to HIS.  His story is the great story being told- and none of us  know exactly how our own story will read - only that it will end well!  This is why we trust, in the important matters, always feels like a risk and why it entails courage.  

God does not have to explain Himself to us, we worship a God who is mysterious - too mysterious to fit into our formulas.  It means God is not our best friend, our secret lover, or our alter ego...HE is our God.  It evens means that it is just as frightening as it is delightful to stand in HIs presence.  Our creaturely relationship with God is one in which we are, at the same time, both irresistibly drawn to HIm and humbled by the grandeur of his holiness. 

I know this, heartache is NOT God's discipline for us.  That is NOT the heart of God!   Sometimes it is easier for people to blame others or themselves.

But accepting the mystery of what we cannot know will lead us to the heart of God - where we trade our craving for explanation for a simple willingness to trust God.


God is so good.  HIS word says, 'surely goodness and kindness shall follow him all the days of his life'...for those who put their TRUST in HIM.

Today is EAster, many will put their trust in stuff.  Some will trust that Publix will still be open, and find it is closed today!  Some... will trust and believe there is no 'hell' -- our God could never do that for His people.    Some will think or trust they can 'get it right with God later, after their are married, after they finish college, or next week'.....
There are people that will trust their car will work tomorrow so they can make it to church the one day of the year they feel guilty...

Is this your TRUST?  Or is Your TRUST in HIM?


When you fall in love with someone...YOU want to be with them, YOU want to read what they wrote, YOU want to tell others...YOU WANT that and you begin to build that relationship and eventually you  TRUST them.  It is the same with God.



 LORD for this blog post this eve - about trust.  I pray it will speak to just one and they will trust YOU and grow deeper in their faith with YOU.  

Trusting...

   Amen.