Monday, July 2, 2018

Harriage is HARD. Bold Prayers #4


Being  ...held......


Natalie Grant wrote this song called "Held" after a friend of hers lost a baby. 

 I did a little research on the word held..or hold.... The Dictionary says,  1.  to have or keep in the hand, keep fast, grasp.  2.  to set aside, to reserve or retain -- like to hold a reservation.  3.  to bear, sustain, or support as with hands or arms or by any other means.  4.  to keep them in a specified state, 'the preacher held them spellbound'. and 5.  to detain, the police held him at the station for questions. 

Held.....then I looked up some more info...The noun held means an act of holding...as a verb, it means to remain in or continue being held.....Did you know there is also definitions for ...
hold back....
hold down....
hold forth....
hold in.....
hold off....
get ahold of .....
hold one's own.....


Then 2 verses were found:  
   2 Thessalonians 2.15    So then brothers, stand firm and hold to the teachings we passed on to you, whether by word of mouth or by letter.

   1 Titus 1.9
  He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.

Then I found this:   the word HOLD with a capital "h" is found in 11 verses in our bible, 9 chapters, and 9 books.....that version is more of the noun hold....

I wanted to write down each verse, I will site a few of my favorite:

Judges 18.19     Nehemiah  8.11     Job   13.13
Psalms 17.5   Hold up my goings in thy paths, that my footsteps slip not.
Psm  109. 1    Amos  6.10    Zephaniah 1.7
Mark 1.25     Luke 4.35       2Tim 1.13
Psalm 119.117   Hold thou  me up, and I will be safe; and I will have respect unto thy statutes continually.

I stopped and pondered why those two verses really STUCK in me....I remember many times in my life when I would beg God to hold up my goings in thy path....and just HOLD me....up....

And in Psm. 119....hold thou me up...JUST HOLD ME UP...how many  times I begged and pleaded that on my behalf. 

How about you...are you begging God to hold you up?

 IF you are, let us stop right now:
Lord, for my sweet sister or for whomever is reading this.....they or she or he needs you ...hold them...hold them up.  Amen. 


Then I came across this.  The word HOLD with a capital H is there 11 times and the word hold with a lower case 'h' ......is in 167 verses...167 verses....49 chapters....35 books...I was astonded.

That is the verb hold !   an action!   God is holding us! 

I did not write down each verse but a few that spoke volumes to me.

One of my life verses:  Exodus 14.14    The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.
Psalm 139.10    Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
Proverbs 3.18  She is a tree of life to them that lay hold upon her and happy is every one that retaineth her.
Proverbs 4.13  Take fast hold of instruction, let her not go, keep her, for she is thy life.
Isaiah 41.13  For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, fear not, I will help thee.

That last verse...spoke life into me many times over the past ten   years.   I don't wish to bring up the past, but I have to share this one story...of HOW this verse spoke life back into me.

    When my  husband and I were separated, almost 7 years ago now,   our son was headed to Louisiana for a soccer tournament.  My husband was being  very kind  and tried to keep the pain he was causing 'at bay'  and therefore he  did not expect to travel with us, as he knew our time together would be  hard, very hard but after prayer, I knew,  he deserved to be able to attend and enjoy the soccer.

 It had been a planned trip and Taylor was traveling with us.  Arrangements had been  made and our time together was difficult but "bearable."  Basically the soccer was fun, the awkward times in between were awkward and hard! 

  WE spent a week together as a family and enjoyed Hunter's  team and their wins and their heartbreak loss on the last day.  The in between times were VERY hard, as sometimes I could only smile for so long and pretend for so long that all was well.  Each evening we would pick a restaurant and sit as a family  and each of us did a good job with keeping conversations 'right and light'.  Anyway, like I said, at times, it would just get too hard to bear and I would excuse myself and head to the ladies room.  At which I would get sick, either lose my lunch or supper or just spit up dry heaves and then look at myself in the mirror and hold my hand up in front of it and recite this verse.

Sometimes I would cry it out, sometimes I had to be very discrete, but I had to remind myself over and over that HE was holding my hand.  God was.   I would literally look in the mirror and hold my hand up in front of that mirror and talk to God through the mirror -- HOLD this!  HOLD me!    I knew or I said, God would get me through.....However, I had to believe and then ACT like I believed it.

HE was going to get me through this and HE would make all things new.  HE did.   The Holy Spirit would take over.  I know this...NOW,  but then, I was literally grabbing onto the promises of God every 2-3 minutes. God's Word is a living Word...grab a verse and HOLD

 I would be able to wipe my tears, recompose myself and head back to the supper or dinner table and smile and just be thankful for the four of us - enjoying time together.   I was SUCH a good actress.  I had to be.

 It was a difficult week.  The kids and I shared a King sized bed and my husband  slept on the floor.  Many nights were spent in prayer as I could not sleep between two kids that literally tossed and turned as they slept and I would hold my arm up in front of my eyes and focus on my hand and recite that verse...and imagine that God was RIGHT there...holding me and being my RIGHT hand......it was a verse I came to paraphrase and repeat often.

Now, bear in mind...that may leave a sad taste in your mind about my husband ..but don't let it.

 I want to tell you that for the past 5 years, I fall asleep each night in his arms...he holds me very tight and waits for me to wiggle out of his grip.  When I awake in the am, he must awake too as he will turn over and quickly grab me and hold me tight.

When he first began to do this, I would just lay there and think...."how long will this last?".  Then it continued and after a few months of expecting it to quit....I awoke one morning and I could hear the Holy Spirit remind me -- "THAT is how God has held you - TIGHT and now I am using your husband to remind you - God is still here."  

This am, that happened again. 

  God can change people.  God will and can change your husband....   or wife. But they have to want to change first....

I believe that.  That brought  even more healing to me today.  That made me smile....


Revelation 20.2
And he laid hold on the dragon, that old serpent, which is the Devil, and Satan, and bound him a thousand years.

Yep...God wins.  Period. 

Lord, for those couples, those wives and those husbands that are waiting for a change within their circumstance and their house -- give them a sign.  May they read your word and know that they know - you are listening and  they are in the palm of your right hand.  Lord, there are specific couples that I could name off at this moment -- touch them in a mighty way.  Lord, that each of them would seek you and want to be HELD by You first and then their spouse.  And may each of these couples want to HOLD their other half -- that victory would be seen within their marriage.  May they give You all the glory.   In Jesus Name, Amen.





 PS - There are several women that I love dearly as sisters in Christ that are still  struggling in their marriages and just in dealing with relationships.  They are trying their best to HOLD still and allow God to HOLD them while their men are either absent or believing a lie.  It hurts.  It is hard.  We were not created to live alone...we, as women, were created to nurture and love -- to build a home.    

And there may be a man reading this today, that is very lonely -- he is wanting his wife back....from whatever has pulled her away or from believing the lies of the enemy.  

I wanted to remind you today -- GOD will win.  Continue to seek Him, continue to pour your frustrations on Him - HE can take it.  He knows.  Continue to believe in something that seems impossible because of the promise that NOTHING is impossible for God.  

Continue to believe that God is working just as HARD on your man...  and even though it seems God won't change his free will.... sometimes I have seen God create such circumstances around the sinner that....the sinner finally opens his eyes!  

Dear Beloved, allow the Lord to HOLD you today ... focus on today -- tomorrow will come when it comes.  You are free to look at others and say nothing....or you can look at others and just be honest, "my marriage is struggling and would you pray for me?".  


God will write YOUR story.  
I share what happened in my life - not to hear myself talk, but to encourage you as when I felt I could not longer wait on God -- HE used the words of another blogger to give me hope.  

God is WHO HE says HE is.  
God will do WHAT He says HE will do...
And Do you believe in God?  
Then focus on HIM today and allow HIM to hold you.  

IN Jesus name... amen.  




- michelle

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