Friday, July 21, 2017

Suffering ---- being an "adult".

 I have been writing blogs to the parents of adult children and to the adult children around me.  This AM as I pray and converse with God, He reminds me that I am an 'adult' child of  parents  as well.  And even my choices and my beliefs don't please them  at times. 

Those of us who have been rescued by God -- have nothing to prove.

I don't say that with arrogance, I just have seen a REAL Jesus and realize that I am a sinner saved by Grace.   And there is a peace within me that knows that she knows....eternally  - I am secure.

I remember about 2-3 years ago, I wanted SO desperately to FUSS at one particular person.  He had made some poor choices which brought a counter reaction from another.  Then something transpired and it was implied that I did this "transpiring" I remember BEING so mad.... but, I was the VERY vocal Christian in this group and it would make sense that I  would be the voice of reason but also the voice of condemnation.  But I would never want to use my words to bring condemnation.    Conviction - perhaps...but not condemnation!

 However it was implied,  I didn't get wind or knowledge  that it had hurt another until much later.  And at that point -- there was nothing I could do.  I really couldn't open the can of worms and scream..."it wasn't me!".   I couldn't go back to the one hurt and try and comfort cause it was literally a LONG time ago.   I just had to sit.  And LIVE my verse  that I love... Exodus 14.14...The Lord with fight for me, I need only be still.   

Today -- I am struggling.   As an Adult....

The struggle between the Spirit of God and evil has been warring since Satan realized the unconditional love God had for Adam and Eve and he wanted to usurp that authority and then deceived Eve....

2 Timothy 1. 8 not be ashamed  to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner.  But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life -- not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace.  

I believe it will become harder and harder to stand on God's Word in these end times.  And even when our own flesh and blood disagree with us - will we stand.  We will stand and suffer? 
Will we speak truth to our counterparts?   God reminds us to speak truth in love ....but sometimes that truth being spoken is so rejected.  I am reminded that God is the one who draws us near -- it is Jesus who saves, but our life...should represent His grace....His mercy....and His love -- period.

However, sometimes the suffering comes SO close to home.  Or it comes from someone SO close to home....namely a dear loved one.  

Suffering is an inescapable part of inhaling oxygen in the atmosphere of this fallen planet.  We are not talking about the suffering that is common to all humans -- Paul suggests in this chapter of Scripture that servants of Jesus suffer some things in direct correlation to the positions God called them to fill.  
A measure of your pain and hardship really is in connection to your calling. 
Some of it is Spiritual Warfare.  Some of it is sociological resistance because the world hates us as it hated Christ and some of it is ordained By God for our growth, our humility, our compassion, our obedience, our completion, our faith, and  read this carefully, our future commendation, joy, and fellowship in His glory.  If we have a throw-down fit and refuse to partake in the sufferings of Christ, we will miss partaking in the explosive joy of that measure of His glory!  
   - Beth Moore ( Entrusted, 2016)

Isaiah 53.6

All, we like sheep,  have gone astray: we have turned -- every one -- to his own way: and the LORD has laid on ( Christ ) the iniquity of us all.  


Where are you today?
Where am I?

As I continue to seek God and seek to understand Him and His plans, I know His plans for me are good.

I know there is NO condemnation for THOSE in Christ Jesus according to His Word in Romans 8 but when we are attacked certainly feels like we are condemned.

As I grow in Christ and walk in Faith with Him -- He changes every relationship and He even removes relationships.   He changes how we spend our time, He changes our motives, even our passions.  He changes how we live and where  we will spend eternity.  He strips us of performing and pretending and lays us bare...

...fully aware of our NEED for HIM.

While it is costly and even threatening -- is is what we were designed for!   

If we trust God and
confess our sins -- we are forgiven.
If we seek God -- He will answer.

It was Christ's blood that was shed for me!  ( and for you!)  

So with that -- I MUST extend the one that really hurt me recently,
I must extend GRACE to the ones that I am extending prayer for....and trust that God is at work.
I must extend GRACE to myself -- that I can mess up too.
I must extend GRACE to the adult children that frustrate me at the moment.  I must extend GRACE to the adults that frustrate me and cause me some late night hours.  But I also but RELEASE those that have burdened my heart a little FAR too long -- they are His children. 

I can't always be perfect, nor know what to say or what to blog, or even how to pray -- but by HIS Grace.....and His mercy..... and with His Word......

Proverbs 3.34 says:   Toward the scorners he is scornful, but to the humble he gives favor.

God was - is --so GOOD to us, despite our sin.  He was merciful to us and gave us Jesus to make us right with HIM. I have to remind myself that those -- even with false teachings and beliefs are dearly loved by our Father.  It hurts His heart more than mine to hear them blaspheme God or make light of eternity.  Hell was not created for us -- it was created for Satan, but unfortunately -- some of our loved ones will be there.   We have free will.  But I trust that God will reach each and  every one of those lost ones in His time and give them the opportunity to repent from their sins --- I just have to. 

However, I totally understand that the heart is weak and many will choose their own way instead of God's way.  Many won't seek His Word and allow the Lord to come in and totally heal them.  Many won't use His Scriptures to question and rebuke the lies of the enemy.  Many have it figured out and just use the expression, "God is bigger and He is love."

Let's move from focusing on our need  - Chell, move on from this
Let's move from focusing on our need ....or prayer request...or on our hurt..... and fix our eyes on the FACE of God.  He changes everything.

Being humble  = being fully occupied with God.

Luke 6: 28-30  
Bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.  To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.  Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back.  

Anger is our reaction to when we feel our rights are being taken away from us.  We get angry about not getting what we think we deserve.   -- But God is calling us to die to those rights.

This is the crazy part - we are to LOVE those who hate us.  It is radical and insane.  We are to be giving to those who don't appreciate it.

..........and that  grace can  be given  --- even when  our husbands --when out of anger and  out of their own issues they lash out at us--
.........and that grace can be given to a friend that does not see eye to eye with us --
......and that grace can be given to an adult child who has made very poor choices --
.......and that grace can be given to the lost, right next to us --

Lord, may the one that reads this understand that being broken before you is a good allows You to become more in their lives.  This includes me today.  I know this -- but needed a reminder!  
 Lord, may the one reading this, including me, seek forgiveness for whatever needs be and that they would also extend forgiveness, including me when out of anger words fly.  

Lord, You carried a cross for me on 'this' day so many years ago and took ALL of my sin.  Lord, You are calling us, calling me to surrender what is not of you and take up our cross .

Lord, I want the freedom found in allowing You to defend me, even IF I don't see it until heaven. 
Lord, I want to accept that life is not right and fair now, but it will be. 
Lord, I want to love instead of defending or fearing or fighting. 
Lord, I pray that I will freely give and not have a sense of entitlement. 
Lord, I pray that as I embrace my faults -- rather than prove my points or defend myself.  
Lord, I pray and release others' perceptions and understandings of me and I pray that I would HOLD onto Your understandings of me -- since You know my heart! 
And Lord, I embrace the death of my 'rights' and desires -- and receive Your will in my life.  Lord, I trust You. 
 I trust the frustration and righteous indignation I feel right now is part of Your plan --   A plan not only for me - but for those around me and for the total stranger READING this right now -- may they Seek Justice, Love Mercy, and humbly walk with You as their God.  And Lord, that they would extend Grace......

But for the others reading this or maybe that one...I pray a RADICAL salvation experience in him or her RIGHT now -- today -- that they may meet you on a road like Saul did -- and it may radically change them, as my hurts for the wife heart hurts for the daughter that disappoints her heart hurts for the mother who constantly has to pray protection over her boys for fear of danger when they are with their dad.....and my heart hurts for the one who won't stand UP for You Jesus -- there, I am proclaiming that indeed....YOU will WIN in these situations -- not for any of my glory but for YOURS.  

In Jesus name, Amen.  

Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?"  
Matthew 16: 24-26

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