Saturday, September 10, 2016

Just forget my name....

This post is being typed with a heavy  but hopeful heart.   

Colossians 3.17 says  " And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."

So Jesus, as I type, I am thankful and grateful for the MANY people - Your people - that I get to love on and live with, but my heart if feeling heavy today.  It has felt heavy for a few weeks. 

Life was  meant to be easy -- but Satan deceived Eve into thinking that God was withholding something.  And she ate of that apple.   I remind myself all the time,  THIS was not God's plan. 

Pastor Robert Morris's definition of GRACE is :  the unmerited, undeserved kindness of God. 

I have seen that so many times.  Most recently 2 weeks ago when I got to LOVE on a little girl.  Some day I hope she calls me "MeMe".  Taylor and I discussed whether it should be "MiMi" or how I spelled it,  as my given name is Michelle;   but oh, I am thinking now, "MeMe chell would sound pretty good too!!   Taylor and her husband are walking within God's grace in a new season of their lives and we are praying that a transition of 50/50 custody will occur and our kids will be more 'full - time' parents instead of once a week.    I truly did not believe this would transpire until  the child was older..... circumstances seemed unreal and yet very hard and by HIS grace and through MUCH prayer -- we have some undeserved Kindness!   And I am claiming more. 

I asked for that.   I asked for some underserved kindness. 

  I have been, I confess, trying to 'quit' on some assignments for the past 3 months.  I keep telling God HE can find another.  I bargain with Him.   I will tell Him, "Ok, I will do that but you must do this." My dear friend says it all the time, "don't do business transactions with God".  I hear her loud and clear and at the end of the day, the Lord knows I submit and that my bargaining or banter back and forth with Him is just our way of  talking to HIM.  He knows my heart.  He knows I want to hear, "well done my faithful servant".  I seek HIS approval.  Moment my moment. 

In Ephesians 4, Paul says, "as a prisoner for the Lord, then.  I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. 

Be completely humble and gently: be patient, bearing with one another in love."

I spoke to one of my siblings  this am, his wife and extended family are dealing with several physical circumstances and diseases -- Chari syndrome, ALS, and Cancer and each day as I walk past my prayer wall/list I see their names and call out to God and just thank Him for the healing that is coming is happening and the grace they are living in as they all walk this out.  My brother's son had some complications with his Appendix this summer and spent a week in the Children's hospital trying to figure out what went wrong.   With prayer and good doctors -- his appendix probably was bad and in  surgery, a nerve must of been nicked -- which cause severe pain afterwards for my 15 year old nephew.   But he is well  now, dressing up to sit with the Varsity Football team each Friday and playing on the JV team as a quarterback.    I praise God, as that young man loves Jesus and I am sure he thanks God everyday. 


I spoke with another -- several in fact, that are dealing with the pain of a child making poor choices, a husband, choosing to walk away from God, and another who just wants to quit -- all of which hurts my heart,  causes it to question God for a nano second cause I want answers for THEM right now and I want to see the goodness of God  in those that are hurting - faster than it is coming.  But God. 

God is RIGHT there with them, providing and extending that grace to them as well. 

Jeremiah 1.5 says:   "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born, I set you apart: I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."   -- God knew all of this. 

So, God knew -- when a dear friend would say, "forget my name" will be only temporary --
So, God knew -- when a man took a blood test it would prove there was dugs and alcohol within it --
So, God knew -- that one of my dear loved ones would have a bad week with her medication --
So, God knew -- that another would end her 'weaker' chemo and begin the 'hard' stuff next --
So, God knew -- another would find some HOPE after being without her husband for over a year as he divorced her --
So, God knew that another's prayer to move his ALS  so he could get to heaven faster -- would be a hard one on his family ---
So, God knew -- another would want to quit so badly, but a bevy of prayer walking warriors would stand behind her and remind her NOT to quit --
So, God knew -- that  another's pain would be healed last Sunday and she would testify to it at church on Wednesday --
So, God knew -- that my heart would be heavy for so many reasons in this time, but HE gave me some instant hope that held me --
So, God knew -- that another would go to her knees for her child who is making bad bad bad choices - so bad that going to jail would be a good thing --
So, God knew -- the one that wanted so desperately to 'come clean'  would try her best to seek forgiveness and then get scared away,  because a 'Christian' gave her false hope--
So God knew -- a man would want his wife and children but his pride would keep him away --
So, God knew -- that total peace would be felt in an awkward situation , but our flesh would still want to fuss --

God knows. 

And as I went through my list of God -- YOU knew this and yet...   !!?? 
I could not bargain with Him -- cause I knew that in each of these situations -- God would bring beauty out of the ashes -- in HIS time. 

God will bring that friendship back around and there will be a 360 - In Jesus name!
God will provide the best treatment center for the one  -- and God will do everything in His power to persuade the father to seek treatment  - In Jesus name.!
God will bring that loved one into the next phase of Chemo as her body is weak but her faith is strong - In Jesus name! 
God will bring perfect  healing and a better doctor for that other loved one who is battling this 'syndrome' that needs more clarity, In Jesus name!
God will hold that family as their dad and husband fights against the ALS and gets closer to his home in heaven, In Jesus name.
God will ...  I could go on -- I have -- God will give more hope, as I continue to seek Him and serve Him. 

There is a saying, "God certainly has us wait a long time for some seasons, but HE is never late!"

If you  have felt the pain of rejection this week -- if someone has told you to forget them or you feel forgotten by God because a prayer has not been answered --- as you see it...then get on those knees and just cry out to HIM. 

Say the Lord's prayer.

Read Psalm 25 and then go to John 15.10... where it states - if you obey my commands  - you will remain in MY Love ....   Stay IN HIS love -- He will provide and HE will NEVER forget your name. 


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