Saturday, February 23, 2013

happy birthday to me!

How selfish hugh?
Blogging about me?


Happy birthday to me!

Have to share a funny first......the other night, I kept speaking about 'turning 48'..."I am turning 48 and how 50 was right around the corner and I did not LIKE it".......Brendan allowed me to vent a bit, and talk for a good minute or two and then he said, "chell, you are only going to be 47, I am 46".....

A light bulb went off and I laughed....I gained a whole year within a few minutes - talk about laughing!
Oh my.
Funny?    Well, I was laughing for a good 5 minutes!   Revelation!

Now I will share a sort of 'vain' and silly thing......I work out with a 'trainer' three days a week.  I pay her to help me  'stay in shape'.......I pay her to 'torture' me.  I say that and I laugh, but seriously, I pay her.  Can you hear that?  I have to, otherwise I WOULD NOT exercise.  I just would not.  And I must admit I do enjoy the 'me' time.  And, it gives me this liberty to 'eat whatever' ...WHICH has to STOP cause my muscles may be increasing but my pants are NOT...ha ha ha.  

 However, each week it does not seem to get easier ( to push myself )  and each week, I find my self taking Advil for something or having to squat gingerly on the commode cause I have some sore quads or very sore calves.  Or, I roll over in bed and wince cause my triceps or biceps  are bothering me.   And I tease and fuss at Shelley and remind her that she can't kill me, and she just pushes me harder!   Anyway....  here is the silly part that bothers me.   Or, this could be the vain part, as in my head I am like 24 years of age  and I can SEE  myself pop right up after doing 60 sit ups or crunches, and then get the barbells and do another 3 sets of reps of 20 chest lifts,   but I can't actually really 'pop up'... I mean, I can barely stand after one set, or I get 'T-REX' arms ( if you can picture that ) and my body reminds me, I am NOT 24.   I am NOT 24!   So, I  often have to remind myself, it is not how old I feel, but how old I THINK.....back to that THINKING thing again.....renewing of the mind. Etc. Etc.

Yesterday, I 'survived' Shelley's Advanced AB class for the first time.  I have been working with Shelley for about 15-18 months now and I am very proud of what I 'can' do now compared to when I started with her, but I have never even attempted a 30 minute AB class with her.  That was like the 'ultimate' scary thing.  However, I did it.  And I did survive it.  I could not do all the exercises but there was another lady there, whom I won't mention but she was older than I.  She is only a few years  older, and she kept up right with Shelley - so, I have a goal - if she can do it, I CAN!   Anyway, it is just mind over matter right?  Ok, enough with the silly stuff...

I did want to post  today about me...but really about God and thank HIM....47 times over  and here I go...

Lord God, Daddy, Father...

1. I just thank you cause I WANT to know you more. I thank you for that HUNGER!
2. I thank you Lord, for the 46 years, that have been VERY good ( even the hard ones ).
3.  Lord, I thank you for two parents that sacrificed much for me and my siblings. And I thank you for the other parents you have brought into my life....Brendan's folks.  Oh God what a blessing!
4. Lord, I thank you for the farm that we grew up on - in so many ways, it was the perfect childhood.
5.  Lord, I thank you for the siblings I fought with, pulled hair with, danced with, cleaned the barn with, lied with, played 'spud' with, and so many more...God, I pray that each of them with their spouses would just run to you and SEEK you with all of their hearts, that the fun can continue in heaven one day when we all get to see you!  And Lord, for the extended family of siblings - Bren's...them too Lord, that each and everyone of them will live in the freedom YOU planned for us!
6.  Lord, I thank you for my education and the ability you provided to attend school, college, and then a job - how I love my profession Lord, thanks!
7.  Lord, for the Florida chapter of our lives...moving here, getting a job ( thank you Mr. Clericuzio!) and then the continued rewards to work in Okeechobee County.  (there are TOO many to mention...but as I sit here this am, and reflect on the 'who'! ) And now the new chapter at PECS and the people there - I am so thankful!
8.  Lord, I thank you for our home that we built and loved and raised kids in.  Lord, for the many golf cart rides and the 'parties' TP would have on the cement with the neighbor kids.
9.  Lord, I thank you for neighbors ...Todd and Rachel that are family and the new neighbors we have now here in our new home.
10. Lord God I thank you for friends....old ones, new ones, and ones that have stood in the gap for us. And for the new dear friends you have for us in our future!
11.  Lord, I thank you for prayer warrior friends that hugged, loved, and stayed on their knees for me...for us...for my kids....for YOU to win.
12. Lord, I thank you for the strong women of faith, that boldly spoke up when they needed to. I continue to marvel at 'whom' YOU used as you are so creative.
13.  Lord, I thank you for YOUR word and its content....its breath....its truth.
14.  Lord, I thank you for YOUR life and the teachings you gave us while on Earth.
16.  Lord, I thank you for Calvary, and WHAT that means.
17.  Lord for your death -
18. Lord, for your death -
19.  Oh God for the cross.......I am so humbled that YOU died for me so that I would have the chance for eternal life.  Thank you God!
20.  Jesus, thank you .....
21.  Jesus........thank you.....
22.  Jesus, that I am a joint heir with you -- Oh, I am so humbled..
23.  Lord, thank you for the home you have provided us with now, bless Al and Denise, and I thank you for the memories  YOU have orchestrated here.
24. Lord, for our 'next' home - which you will provide and guide us too - I am thanking you in advance.
25.  Lord, I thank you for our Insurance office and all the 'stuff' that goes with that.
26. Lord for the blessings through the office, the opportunities and just the chance to allow YOU to shine through it.
27.  Lord, thank you for the future of the office, as you Lead and Direct the path....
28.  Lord God I thank you for write, type, and encourage others, as I believe this is just a ministry I can use to remind and tell others - HOW great you are!
29.  Lord God I thank you for the patience you have bestowed upon me.
30.  Lord, I thank you for the faith you have increased in me.
31.  Lord, I thank you for the Church you have blessed me with and its teaching.
32.  Lord, for my Pastor and his wife and the elders of the church that continue to see the vision...'to make deiciples   that make deiciples'....  ( did I spell that right Lord? )
33.  Lord, thank you for the grace you give and the grace...for my spelling...aha ha!
34.  Lord God, thank you for the continued revelation that comes when I read your word. And for the teachers you have around me that teach me often through your word!
35.  Lord, thank you for YOUR word....again, and its truth!
36.  Lord, thank you for the Encounter weekend that I experienced back in February of 2011 and the power of YOU that just came upon me.
37. Lord thank you for the godly counsel that has gotten me to this point...I thank you for Donna Robards, and then Carlene, and then Dave, Linda and Connie  and others....others that YOU used. ( Random and yet perfect!)
38.  Oh God, thank you for Exodus 14.14...and the other scriptures that speak LIFE into a hurt soul.
39.  I thank you Lord, that the truth of God wins - means so much.
40. I thank you for the hurt that has brought you...and another back to YOU. Thank you for our past - it is our history and it has made us whom we are today.....
41.  I thank you for the blessing of being a mom to Taylor, what a women that loves you Lord. Tears of joy flow out as I look and believe ahead of her for her future....hold her heart!
42.  I thank you for Hunter and his future, as I know it will be serving you. OH God, I can't wait to see what YOU have for him!
43.  I thank you for Brendan. Period.  I can't begin to start....somethings are best left unsaid, but as I believe you impressed upon me the first time I saw him, back in 9th grade, I know that now he is and was very  important to me and he has become my best friend.  Lord, thank you for showing me HOW to love him the RIGHT way, with YOU first.    I especially thank you that we have been prayer warriors TOGETHER for you.
44.  I thank you for Kimberly, Jordan, and even Fred...and I am sure there are others that will celebrate their birthdays today!  I thank you for birthdays!     ( However, I believe that from this point on, I will celebrate #47 again and again and again!)
45.  I thank you for my students in my classroom and my sweet girl, Brooke, who brings joy to me each day as I work and try to 'prepare' these kids for middle school and the FCAT in April! OH God, did you catch that -- I want their BEST test scores!!  Not that I will be judged by a number, but the state does and I want my kids to SHINE!   You know Lord, I speak about you often to the kids - here is your chance for some 12 mini- miracles....amen!  LOL
46. I thank you for the miracle of YOU shed bled, and that YOU do raise people from the dead...from their slumber to freedom in you.....and
47. I thank you for me....I am only what I am cause of you.

I know you deeply love me,  you have provided ALL that I need, and I am humbled that YOU love me Lord....just as much as you loved David, Sarah, and even Lot.  That just sort of freaks me out - that you LOVE me that much...and yet, it doesn't.

People say I am this 'strong' women....ha...if they could only see me as I literally grab your word and fall asleep with it on my chest crying out to you - YOU make me strong - it is ALL YOU!

People say I have great faith...or is it stubbornness?  Either way - it is what YOU planted in me.  YOU made me this way.   I hear that people look up to me ....oh God...I pray they don't put me on a pedestal, as I will fail...I pray THEY see YOU in ONLY YOU ..only you 'is' the one we should admire. I pray they see YOU in me.

Happy Birthday to me, Lord, thank you for the 46 years.  As I live #47 out....I want to finally read your ENTIRE word from start to finish and find NEW and fresh revelations.  I want to run at least 3 5K's and I want to be like Kim and keep up with Shelley in AB class.  Big goals - right?  Funny ones?   Selfish?  Oh and I want to 'ride' that bike by myself too now that I am legal.

But really Lord, my biggest goal, is just to be your servant, your steward, and BE the light ( matthew 5.16) that others see - use me Lord, teach me more, continue to draw me near.  I just want to hear, 'atta girl' when I see you someday.

- me

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