Wednesday, March 12, 2014

...and on another day -- I just want to crawl up and escape...

1 Cor 15:58 NIV 

Therefore, my dear Michelle - stand firm. Let nothing move you.  Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

( I wrote and posted this blog on Wednesday -- March 12, 2014.  I did not link it to Facebook right away, because I wanted to just 'protect it'.  As I drove back into town after school on Wednesday, I cried out to God and asked HIM to please MEET me at church that night.  HE DID.  Of course. And HE confirmed something.  HE confirmed HIS love for me and spoke directly through another what the bottom line 'fear' was.....I added that in towards the bottom of this blog.  Therefore, this blog is a little long too -- if you are patient and read to the end, I believe you will be blessed.  I have to share -- cause THIS is how God speaks to me and lifts me up  -- and I get encouraged. ) 

Today sucked.
I  almost ran out of gas - not paying attention.
Only 50% of my students are in attendance and I struggle with WHAT to start and what to wait on.
My pants are dirty and I did not realize it.
I said something again to offend another.
I was late for a devotional prayer thing that I was leading today....
I allowed the enemy to whisper to me......and cause me to doubt.
And I heard more disturbing news -- that just saddened me.  It hurt. It brought me to tears and I had to repent of my 'own self-righteousness'......and ask -- HOW can I pray?
And I really WANT a direct Word from God - to remind me - and let me know ...."I am off the hook".

Then I reread the scripture that I have been claiming this week.  1 Cor 15.58 --   to stand firm.

My flesh does not want to believe that now.
My flesh wants a BIG letter from God - addressed to me - reminding me of WHAT good I have done of late.....
My flesh wants affirmation.....just saying.

How can I encourage another when doubt is creeping in?

Today just sucked.
If I could - I would get a punching bag and box this evening....
If I could, I would rewind these past few days.....
If I could,  I would crawl right under my covers and sleep until Spring Break.

But I can't.  I won't.  I will just be still and quiet and know -- no matter what -- HE still adores me.
I may not 'feel' it right now.........but.......

And I don't mean to post this  today  and GRIPE that today  was a 'sucky' day to get LOTS of encouragement ....

ESPECIALLY after I just posted about 'quit the bla bla bla....' yesterday.

I post because  there is another that needs to know -- somedays are JUST like this....

Often our walk is 2 steps forward and one back -- but we must continue to fight!

...even for a woman who knows...GOD wins......there are days in which I must...

I am going to seek the advice of another for a bit -- and go off and Enter the silence ....and wait for hope to appear.

Just saying.

humbled, accepted, adopted, redeemed, and forgiven and blessed
Lord, thank you for today. Thank you for the 'yuck' as it in that -- that You speak.


Ok, THAT was yesterday.  Today is a NEW day.
WOW how quickly ones disposition can turn, how quickly HE can bring forth a blessing and you get that HUG from God....and all is well again.

For now.  No, seriously - it is WELL within my soul.  Let me explain.

I drove into town.  Prayed. Cried.  Worked.  I had a meeting.  I had to cancel my 'work out time'.  I got news of a loved one passing and cried about that but rejoiced about HOW much time GOD granted to her after her first experience with cancer -- about 17 years ago.  And I went to church.

I know that WHEN I am feeling like I am being beaten up or misunderstood -- GOD reaches down to me and speaks and comforts and makes it good with me.

HE did.  Excellent praise and worship.  I had to hold down the 'greeting' job cause my better half was not there - but I got to pray with a dear woman and be prayed for as well.  AND....I got that word from GOD.

My sister in Christ stated, "michelle, the Lord is telling me - YOU HAVE nothing to fear -- YOU are doing everything I am asking of you and I love you".  Whoa.....tears....humbled.  God does that.  She is my dear pal and we talk alot -- but in the past 2 weeks, I have been barely able to say 5 words to her.....much less allow the right amount of time to VENT to her ....and then seek godly advice.  But God knew that -- and I believe God had us 'quiet' for a that when HE spoke through her -- it would be SUCH a great revelation to me....a direct Word from my Heavenly FAther.

God does that -- for ALL of us.  For each of us.  For you...if you are reading this and yesterday was the day that ALL HELL broke loose...or a spouse left you....or your divorce was final or you had the meeting to start the process.....or a dear loved one went home to heaven.... or if your Principal mistook your email  and scolded you.....or if your husband assumed something and you felt he did not cherish you...or if you went to church alone cause your family is all against you....or if yesterday was the DAY that sucked for can be a NEW day.

1 Cor 15:58 NIV 

Therefore, my dear Michelle - stand firm. Let nothing move you.  Always give yourself fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.

Your labor is NOT in vain.... Keep fighting the good fight.  

God will never leave us...nor forsake us...Hebrews 13.5 
God wins.  
God will COME to YOU and speak directly into your head and heart and remind you of HIS love for you as well -- if you let him and ASK.  

It might mean -- getting yourself into church or a place where other sisters in Christ can encourage and PRAY with you...

It might mean -- stopping something that is NOT working.....
It might mean -- changing an attitude....

It might mean - - you need to seek some forgiveness or repent....I am UNSURE of WHAT it is -- but don't let whatever it is...block it.     

This life is a challenge. I laid my head onto my pillow last night at 1:57 am  ( I had the joy of laughing from 9pm - 1am. ..with my sister and my daughter as we drove to and  home from Orlando  International Airport -- we had picked another one of our sisters from Wisconsin...and that was the CHERRY on the Sundae of my day) I laid my head on my pillow - and thanked God for HIS faithfulness ....

I prayed for that family that has had HELL descend upon them over the past few days...
And I prayed for a heart that is seeking God...
And I prayed for a husband that wants restoration within his home...
And I prayed for my children and man...and me...I just said - GOD - YOUR will be done.  
Amen.  And Thank you Lord. !!  I love you --  

1 comment:

  1. As always right on point! I really wish I could find the spy cameras u implanted in my heart n mind. Then again I wouldn't get what I need so desperately need to hear. I love you sister and so greatfull God planted you in my life all those years ago.


Please let me know how this touched you . . . thanks!